♥ This Anniversary Will Never Be The Same
Monday, August 9, 2010

because i'm fragile and you were one of the very few who broke me.
i admit, i made a mistake when i threw us away but i can't bring myself to regret whatever it is i ever did, like how you want me to. i can't change myself to be exactly what you want me to be. you have to stop trying to change me. i'm me. i can't be anybody else. especially not someone you'd consider perfect.
it's not that i'm angry anymore but there's so many things standing here between us that i can no longer see you. i'm not angry anymore, i'm just thinking a whole lot more. and now i think i'm not sure.
we've obviously changed so much. this doesn't feel the same anymore. or maybe it does. my mind's the biggest maze right now but being with you is something i'm seriously contemplating. you have your friends now and it's kind of obvious who comes first. and i get it. i honestly do.
don't worry. i'm not saying this for any other reason. you can believe what you want but i know what's real and what's not. your friends can say whatever they want and you'll believe them. so i don't mind. i'm just trying to empty this head of all these screaming thoughts.
i guess, you'll probably get really sad that i said this but i had to. and since you don't wanna talk me, face to face, i'll never know how you feel and what you really want but right now this is me saying that i'm not ready yet. i'm just not. i'm sorry but my head's all over the place with other things i have to worry about and right now
this is what i really need. just to be me for a while.