Your Personal

I Can Feel A Heartbeat Play On My Right Side
Sunday, September 18, 2011

"To see you when I wake up
is a gift I didn't think could be real
to know that you feel the same
as I do
is a three fold utopian dream
you do something to me
that I can't explain
so would i be out of line
I if I said
I miss you"

- Incubus

In Case I Fall And Break Apart
Friday, September 9, 2011

Can I cry just a little more ? Would it be alright for me to fall apart, just for a day or so. I have no idea what's going on in my head sometimes. I start to think too much and then, there are times I just go blank. My head goes empty and my emotions fade away.

I need you so much more than you need me and I realise this but it doesn't mean that you don't need me, right ? I feel so lonely still. It's almost as if I walk alone in a world full of eyes just staring down at me, judging every step I take, watching all my mistakes then using them against me, breaking me down.

I'm afraid to go to sleep. I keep having nightmares and they're really not very funny. They feel so real and they seem to take the breath out of me so when I wake up, I feel like I never did sleep. I just feel even more tired.

I wanna be able to fall apart but I can't. With everything going on, I haven't been able to really get a hold of myself. I've had to hide everything this whole time and for once, I just wanna fall apart properly. Is that bad ? Would it be too selfish of me, to want this one self-destroying thing for myself because I don't think I'll be able to survive any longer if I don't do anything about it.

I just wanna fall apart. There won't be any need to put me back together, I'll be too far over the edge.

The Moment He Laid Eyes On You, He Knew
Thursday, September 8, 2011

Hold me please ?
don't let go,
keep me safe with a kiss,
pretend we don't know,
because we don't,
I can't go through,
not you without you,
so cliche,
so fucking annoying,
do whatever you may,
without thought of going,
I feel this is true,
this is right,
I'm so amazed by you,
I long for you at night,
these times feel so long,
please hold my hand,
keep me strong,
until the very end.

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