Day 1.


1. I wish I could show you how much I really do love you. My day doesn't start until I hear your voice and it doesn't end very well if you're not on the other line snoring away. I seem to have a need for your intellectual immaturity. I feel like a complete kid when I'm with you and we never run out of things to talk about. Even if it is the dumbest things. You piss me off so badly sometimes and you make me cry. Yet despite all that, I can't go a day without you. I really love you and it freaks me the hell out but yeah, I want to end up with you.

2. I think I'm mostly disappointed because unlike everybody else, I actually rely on you to make me feel better when things are down. Out of all the people there, I didn't think it would be you. Sure I felt bad but I thought maybe it would mean more to me than it would to you. After the whole thing, the best part was when you slammed the door on my face when I sent you home.

3. Don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore ? Because now, I'm actually happy, even in my loneliest moments, I'm happy. I hope you never treat anybody else the way you treated me. Maybe it was karma what you did to me but no one else deserves it from you. Especially if they truly love you.

4. You're my best friend. I can't possibly imagine not having you around. Now that you started college again, I obviously won't get to see you very much but it's alright, we still have Skype. Thank you for being a true friend to me.

5. Hey, best friends, baby. I don't remember the exact time I said that to you but I know I've said it more than enough over the years. I still think it's pretty amazing how we ended up becoming so close and how we're still so close to this day. I couldn't imagine high school without you. Thank you for being there.

6. You're all grown up now, and as much as I hate to admit it, I'm scared of it. You'll always be my baby and the thought that my baby is growing up freaks me the hell out but don't worry. I'll always be here to protect and even if one day, I'm not physically there, you know there will be some psycho ghost wherever you are calling you 'fatass'.

7. I'm sorry.

8. I'm sorry I'm no longer the grandchild you loved so dearly. I've obviously changed but I am more myself than I have ever been. I still do and say the things I did as a kid but I understand if seeing me all grown up is too hard for you. I still love you just as much and I still respect more than anyone else I know.

9. You were never really my saviour, which is why I always grew up looking out for myself and Yana but the way you make it out as if I owe you everything I have doesn't make any sense. I remember many things growing up but I guess you don't and you need to understand that I respect you but I will never look up to you.

10. You're amazing because you are who you are, no matter what anybody else says or thinks of you.